If This Was A Movie
by momentofweakness
Summary: Eclare. Two shot with inspiration from Taylor Swift's If This Was A Movie. Clare needs him. She needs him back in her life. He would never come back, would he? After all, she did ask him that one question. Can I stay the night?
1. Chapter 1

_**Everything in her life was failing; leaving her more and more heart broken. Her sister away in Africa, trying to stick to her good girl image and being a good daughter and then to dealing with her parents fighting violently in front of her very eyes. **_

_**What made her stay strong? The one and only Eli Goldsworthy. The only one to make her feel special and loved. The only one who would catch her when she falls. She loved him like he loved her. She would think "What would ever ruin this thing we called love?" Maybe the certain ring on her finger, the sign of abstience. She wanted him, he didn't want her. He didn't wanna ruin her innocence, the only thing that screams "Clare Edwards!" She was too fragile and too beautiful and the last thing he needed was her to regret it. Not to mention he had a dark past that haunted him. **_

_**It's been 6 months since they last seen each other; since she last seen his beautiful green sparking eyes and soft, angelic face. She was suffering inside but she knew she had to be strong. **_

_**But what if she can't take it anymore? What if she dreams and hopes and prays he'll come back into her life? After all, she deserves to be happy too, right?**_

_If This Was A Movie:_

_Last night I heard my own heart beating_

_Sounded like footsteps on my stairs_

_Six months gone and I'm still reaching_

_Even though I know you're not there_

I needed him. I needed him to survive. It's been way to long since I've last seen his beautiful face and his signature smile and smirk. And the way his voice sounded when he would tell me he loved me..I needed that.

Ever since my dad and mom started fighting, I started to die inside. I kept everything inside. Well not until I met him. Eli Goldsworthy.

He taught me to let everything out, to not hold it in. To stick up for myself when I needed to. To be myself but be happy and confident with it. And at the same time, I was falling for him.

It's not like I had anyone else. I didn't have any many friends or any support system. My friend Alli would always be with her boyfriend Drew, making out with him and being all lovey dovey. I didn't need to see that, specially when I didn't have anyone for myself.

My other friend Adam was more of Eli's friend. He would be there for me when I needed it but since we broke up, we haven't really talked. It would be a "Hi, how are you?" and that was it.

My sister was gone in Africa and left me here with my sensitive mother and conceited dad. They would fight and fight, right in front of my very own eyes. What would I do? Try my best to not break down right there. They sometimes would hardly notice me standing there. They would think none of it bothered me. Like them yelling and screaming was okay.

I wanted them to just tell me. Tell me that they were going to file for a...divorce. That word scared me half to death and the thought of my parents not being together...I didn't really imagine it. Everything was all fine when Darcy was here, but when she left me here alone with them, they broke and blamed each other for almost everything.

I was sick of being that little, innocent, sweet angel. I was Saint Clare to many people. Did I like being called this? Not really. I wanted to finally stand up for myself the way I wanted to and prove to people that I wasn't just a saint. I wasn't this clean, sweet Christian girl with two respectful parents, loving God with all their hearts.

Eli was different then me. Very different. From the dark gothic look, to his religious views, to the way he looks at life...It was different but it was soothing to me. I wanted to be different.

_I was playing back a thousand memories baby_

_Thinkin bout everything we've been through_

_Maybe I've been going back too much lately_

_When time stood still and I had you_

We were English partners. Not only did he help me try and let everything out, he helped me with my writing, where I could express my feelings. I wrote a paper about my parents and I was going to read it to everyone but my mom was there and I didn't wanna tell her how I felt about it in front of hundreds of other people.

He was everything to me. To this day, I regret doing what I did. I just wanted to make him happy. I just wanted us to become closer. I wasn't rebelling against anything, I just wanted him.

He didn't wanna hurt me. He had told me "This isn't what you are." Well I didn't, and to this day, don't know who I am. After all of the pain I've gone through and him there to witness most of it, he knew I had changed because of what I was feeling inside.

He...sorta blew me off. Denied me. Told me he couldn't do it anymore. He didn't wanna hurt me. From his past and the present, I guess I was just too much for him to handle.

He had a girlfriend named Juila. They were soul mates. They were fighting too much and they couldn't stand each other anymore. They were both saying bad things to each other, when she decided to walk out. He cursed her out and said some negative things that caused her to grab her bike and cry home. Well, not all the way. She could hardly see where she was going and got into an accident and..passed away. It was 2 years ago and to this day, he still isn't over her. That's what ruined our relationship. His past was there to haunt him.

He thought he killed her. He knew he was the reason she was all upset and was crying too much. He lives in regret.

When he was in pain and I was in pain, how would it work out?

I wanted to be closer to him and he hurt me. What did I do? Walked away like she did to him. Walked out of his life.

_Come back come back come back to me like_

_You would you would if this was a movie_

_Stand in the rain outside til I came out_

_Come back come back come back to me like_

_You could you could if you just said you're sorry_

_I know that we can work it out somehow_

_But if this was a movie you'd be here by now_

So here I lay, in my bed, restless and careless. For 6 months, I slug around, not caring, not smiling, nothing. I haven't seen him at school, I haven't seen him at his house, he never returned my phone calls, and after a few weeks, I stopped. I stopped bothering him. I would think "If he wants me back, he'll come back."

He probably never will..

_I know people change and these things happen_

_But I remember how it was back then_

_Locked up in your arms and our friends are laughing_

_Cause nothing like this ever happened to them_

Alli would always tease us about how much we were in love and how we would never break up. She would say "Me and Drew will never have something as strong as you and Eli!"

I would smile wide and hold his hand tightly as my other arm wraps around his shoulder. He spoke up and smirked. "We don't plan on breaking up..ever."

I felt a tear drop fall from my eye as I wiped it away furiously. I was never mad, just heart broken. He would constantly tell me he would never leave me and couldn't imagine us not together.

_Now I'm pacing down the hall_

_Chasing down the street_

_Flashback to a night when you said to me_

_Nothing's gonna change not for me and you_

_Not before I knew how much I had to lose_

"Clare." He had whispered, sending shivers down my spine. He placed my curls over my ear as I looked up at him, still shivering from his touch. "Eli." I had replied back, out of my breath.

"I love you." He kissed my lips ever so softly, but enough to send me to heaven.

"I love you too." I whispered back.

"I want to promise you something." He turned serious now and all I did was nodd. "I promise you, Clare Edwards, I will never ever leave you and I will promise to love you as much as I can. Do you believe in this promise?"

All I did was nodd and the tears started to fall when I noticed the promise ring in his hand. He kissed my cheek, wiping away the tears that were fallen. He placed the promise ring on my other hand from my purity ring and kissed my lips sweetly.

I believed him. I loved him. I still love him...

_If you're out there, if you somewhere, if you're moving on_

_I'd be waiting for you ever since you've been gone_

_I just want it back the way it was before_

_And I just wanna see you back at my front door_

_And I'd say..._

I was hoping he would come back to my door and apologize. Say that he loved me and needed me but didn't wanna hurt me..I didn't understand that day. He never gave me a good explaination. Why didn't you wanna love me? Why didn't you wanna at least tell me..not now?

_Come back come back come back to me like_

_You would you would if this was a movie_

_Stand in the rain outside til I came out_

_Come back come back come back to me like_

_You could you could if you just said you're sorry_

_I know that we could work it out somehow_

_But if this was a movie you'd be here by now_

_You'd be here by now_

_It's not the kind of ending you wanna see now_

_Baby what about the ending_

_Oh I thought you'd be here by now oh ohh ohh ohh_

_That you'd be here by now.._

I sighed and closed my eyes tight. I was alone home, as usual. Parents at what they call it "Talking time." I knew what they were really doing. Either planning a divorce or trying to work it out by doing therapy. I was hoping it would be therapy but the fighting was too much.

I had to admit, since they found out about my newly depression, they haven't been fighting too much. I'd sneak and him my mom say "Let's not be too loud now, Clare is upstairs." or "Let's take this outside, Clare is in the house."

I was desperate to get out of the house somehow but where was I to go? Everywhere reminded me of him. The Dot, the park, even school. I just wanted to stay in my room, on my bed and continue staying depressed until one day, magically, he would show up at my door.

In my dreams.

I opened my eyes by the sound of the door opening and I heard my mother's voice. "Clare! Clare come down here!"

What now? The talk, finally?

I groggily walked down the long steps and made my way to the bottom. As I was about to roll my eyes at my mom and dad's presence, someone other then them got my eyes widen with full of attention as my heart started to skip a beat.

Green eyes met with blue as I was left with my mouth hanging wide open.

Eli.

**So this was my first Eclare story! Don't blame me if it sucks because I was only reading my favorite author's stories and not actually writing an Eclare one so bear with me if it sucks, okay? I'm still progressing as a writer so I know some of the scenes may be a bit confusing or something.**

**But if you really liked it or have any comments..you should leave me a review. Many of the Degrassi fans on here are amazing and the reviewers give so much good feedback so I'm hoping on at least a few!**

**I plan for this to be a two shot or maybe three shot..Either way it's fun to write**

**I love you guys! **

**Oh and follow my tumblr? xsparksfly . tumblr . com**

**:)**

**-Nessa**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Everything in her life was failing; leaving her more and more heart broken. Her sister away in Africa, trying to stick to her good girl image and being a good daughter and then to dealing with her parents fighting violently in front of her very eyes. **_

_**What made her stay strong? The one and only Eli Goldsworthy. The only one to make her feel special and loved. The only one who would catch her when she falls. She loved him like he loved her. She would think "What would ever ruin this thing we called love?" Maybe the certain ring on her finger, the sign of abstience. She wanted him, he didn't want her. He didn't wanna ruin her innocence, the only thing that screams "Clare Edwards!" She was too fragile and too beautiful and the last thing he needed was her to regret it. Not to mention he had a dark past that haunted him. **_

_**It's been 6 months since they last seen each other; since she last seen his beautiful green sparking eyes and soft, angelic face. She was suffering inside but she knew she had to be strong. **_

_**But what if she can't take it anymore? What if she dreams and hopes and prays he'll come back into her life? After all, she deserves to be happy too, right?**_

_If This Was A Movie:_

I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. My mouth continued to hang open and my eyes widened in surprise. "Eli." Was all I choked out. My parents noticed the now awkwardness and walked into the kitchen.

"Hi Clare." He greeted me with a small smile, enough to make my heart skip a beat. "Can we take a walk or something?"

I could hardly speak still so all I did was nodd and followed him out the door. It was an average autumn night. The leaves ruffled on the floor, the cold air with blowing winds, the now beautiful red and orange trees...

I tried to keep warm from my small long sleeved shirt but it was failing. He noticed my moves and motioned his sweater to me. At first I shook my head but then I took it with a small thanks.

As I placed it in on, I took in the scent that I have missed for so long. Musk mixed with cinnamon. I looked at him and looked deep into his green eyes. "What are you doing here?" I asked softly.

He stopped walking to face me and he turned serious. "I came by because..I missed you."

"I missed you too, but when-"

He cut me off. "Let's not bring up the past. I'm here because I missed you and I know it's been several months but I couldn't stand being away from you. It was getting more and more impossible everyday."

"Then..why.." I took a deep breath, trying not to remember too much about that night. "Then why...did you let me leave?"

"Because." I felt him take my hand and he held it tightly. I was shocked at his touch but gradually got used of it, like as I used to. "I was afraid of what we were becoming. That we were being too close and that we would make the mistake that I didn't wanna do. I didn't want you to do something you didn't and I loved you too much to see you hurt."

"You could've told me that then. I thought you just didn't wanna deal with me anymore." I whispered this and stared down at the floor, embarrassed to look up.

"I would never do that, leave you just because I wanna quit being with you. When I told you I would never leave you and love you forever...I meant that. I still do love you and I never will stop." He looked down at the ring that was still visible. After 6 months, it was still there. It was the only memory left that I had of him.

I looked up and met his glazy green eyes, full of sympathy and love. "Then why didn't you ever return my calls and texts? And you were never home or came to school.."

He sighed hard and squeezed my hand tighter. "You really wanna know?"

I nodded almost too much. "Please, tell me."

"I didn't wanna bother with it. I would try and explain but I would hurt you more and more. I didn't want you to think I didn't wanna..be with you, like that. Trust me, I did. I wanted it so badly but it wasn't the right time. I told my parents to switch my school and so they did. And I stayed with my grandmother for awhile until I thought you would of moved on and not come to my house. Trust me, when I saw you online, I would be dying to talk to you. I read the texts you gave me, over and over again. It was the only memory left that was related to you. I so badly wanted to reply back and then run by you and see you and kiss you senseless and apologize so much until you kiss me to shut up. I am so sorry, Clare. I realized it was the wrong thing to do the second you left..but I knew you needed some time to breathe and in the process, I was hurting you. I am so sorry."

He looked so apologetic that I felt so sorry for him. I should be so mad at him, for hurting me the way he did. He didn't wanna hurt me by taking away my innocence so he denied me but he didn't mean to. He didn't mean to hurt me the way he did. I know most of this had to do with Juila. I know I wasn't her replacement. I was hoping now he got over it because it was the main reason we struggled.

"Eli, don't apologize. I'm not going to blame myself so let's just stop blaming each other and...if you wanted.."

I knew what I wanted. To be with him again. To love him more then before, if possible. To be with him forever. I needed him and I was hoping he thought the same.

"What do you want, Clare?"

"I want you." I bit my lip as I blushed, the pink tint forming on my cheeks. I could just feel it. Eli smirked and it was one of the things I missed the most about him; his signature smirk.

"Well then." He replied, trying to be calm. "Does this mean I'm forgiven?"

I nodded slightly and smiled. "Of course you are. I missed you so much, Eli."

He moved closer to me and wrapped his hands on my waist and looked me in the eyes seriously. "What can I do for you to forget this? I feel like you'll never forgive me for hurting you so much."

I felt my self confidence build as I gave him an evil grin. "Just shut up and kiss me."

"I thought you'd never ask." He smirked and before I knew it, I felt that familiar sparks fly through my veins as his lips captured mine; long, hard, passionate and perfect. My arms wrapped around his neck, while he slipped his hands to my waist and pressed us closer together, a groan escaping the back of his throat.

He smiled at me and leaned down to kiss me again, slow at first but quickly leaping his tongue out to brush against my lips. I parted my lips as he let his tongue touch mine. I felt a shot of electricity run through my body, giving me more and more confidence to kiss him back even harder. He moaned again in the kiss, causing me to let out a soft moan. "You're so beautiful." He whispered, causing me to blush again. I could barely make out my thoughts as he moved his lips to my neck, sucking on it hard, leaving his mark. "Eli." I moaned, pulling his dark hair with my delicate fingers.

He moved from my neck to my ear, licking the shell of my ear and leaving butterfly kisses down to my shoulder blade. "I really really want you right now."

"I want you too, Eli."

As he was about to kiss me again, I felt my phone vibrate in my jeans and I sighed, disappointment rushing through me. It was my mom and I placed it back in my pocket. "She probably wants me back. You can stay over for dinner, if you want."

"No, you have dinner with your family. I'll see you tomorrow?"

I automatically frowned. "But I just got you back."

"And I'll be back again tomorrow. I got a whole day planned for the two of us."

I tried my best to smile even though I only wanted to be with him. Stupid parents and their stupid rules. "Well okay. Walk me home?"

He grinned. "Of couse, Blue Eyes."

He walked me home, holding me tight, never taking his hands off me. I think he missed me more then I missed him.

As we reached my house, I turned to him and I noticed the love and passion in his eyes. "Eli." I started, feeling nervous again.

"Yes?" He lifted my chin with his finger and our eyes locked.

"I'm really glad you came back."

"I'm glad I'm back too." He let out a small laugh and placed a strand of my hair over my ear. I smiled at his touch and leaned in to kiss him softly on the lips. "Text me later?"

"Of course."

As I was about to turn around and leave, he pulled me back to him with much force and before I had time to process this, his lips met mine again, the fire and burning sensation through me hit even harder. My heart pounded and I couldn't think straight. All I could think about was Eli and his love for me.

He licked my bottom lip and I tried my best to not let out a moan. I parted my lips as he entered, our tongues battling for dominance. His tongue brushing over mine almost sent me over the edge as I let out a moan.

"Oh God Clare." He whispered sexily. "You're perfect."

He lifted my shirt slightly and rubbed my stomach. I relaxed at his touch and when he pulled his hands out, I felt disappointment. He went back to my lips, giving them the most attention.

"I..better...go back in.."

"Yeah, probably." He smirked again and kissed me harder.

I kissed him back but pulled away, out of breath. "Seriously, Eli."

He frowned slightly but held my hands tighter. "Oh okay, we don't want you grounded or anything."

"Yeah. Bye, Eli." I walked up to the front door and before I opened the door, I heard him call my name.

"Clare?"

"Yes, Eli?"

His eyes were more full of love now. "I love you."

I blushed the deepest shade of red and smiled. "I love you too."

As much as I didn't wanna go in, I gave him a small wave and closed the door behind me.

My parents were shockingly silent at the dinner table and I gave them a smile. "Where have you been?" My dad asked.

I didn't have to reply, my smile already gave it away. I heard my mom whisper "Well that's obvious" under her breath. I smiled again and sat down at the table with them.

Dinner was silent and I was too excited when I finished eating as I ran to my room and noticed I had a bunch of texts.

_I love you._

_I already miss you._

_You mean so much to me._

_I again am so sorry. _

_You're perfect. And beautiful and guess what? You're mine._

I couldn't stop blushing and smiling and I wanted to reply but I didn't exactly know what to say. What I replied back to?

_You're the only person who can make me smile. I missed you so much Eli._

I closed my eyes shut and smiled. Today was one of the best days of my life. After constantly crying, wishing, dreaming and praying he'd come back..he did. I know things won't be as easy, but they won't be the way they were before.

So much can change over the months- specially if you have to change alone. I wouldn't be that girl who would rebel against her parents and morals to change and prove to her boyfriend she can love him. She didn't have to do that. She could be herself and people would accept her for it.

Her parents seem to be getting along, Eli is back in her life..what else could she want?

She smiled as she saw the text he had given her.

_I am totally coming back to Degrassi._

He didn't mention one word about..her. I knew by now he probably had gotten over her. Instead of thinking he couldn't love anyone else, he realized she would want him to be happy too...and he did find happiness, and so did..In each other.

If this was a movie...well in my perfect romantic movie, the guy and girl fall in love, they have fights, break up, but then one day, after hoping and dreaming he'd come back, he does and they live happily ever after. They may seem cheesy but hey, it's always the best movies.

Our movie didn't even finish yet. We had so much more to go but all I know is that nothing will ever change between us, only our love growing stronger.

And I wouldn't change a thing.

**Yeah, a cute little story! It was short but I had soo much fun writing it and I just wanna say thank you to everyone who reviewed the first chapter! Seriously, you all are amazing!**

**Please put me on author alert because more Eclare stories are on the way! If you follow my tumblr, you'll see my posts about them and when they are up! Anyways...**

**If you have any ideas about upcoming stories, let me know in a review and I'll see what I can do!**

**Thanks loves! (:**

**-Nessa**


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